A financial consent order explained through a real story why divorce alone doesn’t settle your finances.
We Thought Divorce Was the End… It Wasn’t
When our divorce came through, we both felt a sense of relief. The arguments had stopped. The paperwork was done. Friends told us we could finally move on.
But within months, the messages started again.
“Have you sorted the savings?”
“What about the pension?”
“Are we still sharing the house proceeds?”
We had assumed everything was “understood.” It wasn’t.
This is where many people find themselves. Divorce ends the marriage, but it does not automatically deal with finances. Without a financial consent order, the financial ties between you can remain open.
This blog explains what a financial consent order is, why it matters, and how it could have saved us months of stress.
What Is a Financial Consent Order?
A Financial Consent Order is a legally binding document approved by a court. It records the financial agreement between divorcing couples.
It can cover:
Property (family home or other assets)
Savings and investments
Pensions
Debts
Spousal maintenance
Once approved, it becomes enforceable. That means both people are expected to stick to the terms.
Without it, even if you have agreed everything informally, either person can make a financial claim in the future.
If you want a deeper breakdown, this guide on a financial consent order explains the process in more detail.
Our Story: When Communication Breaks Down
We didn’t use mediation. We didn’t write anything down properly. We just agreed things over text and calls.
At the time, it felt easier.
But we had very different understandings:
One of us thought the savings were already divided
The other believed they were still to be shared
We hadn’t discussed pensions at all
Small misunderstandings quickly turned into bigger disputes.
Looking back, the issue wasn’t just the finances. It was communication. We couldn’t have a calm conversation anymore, and that made everything harder.
Why Divorce Alone Doesn’t Protect You
This is one of the biggest misconceptions.
Divorce legally ends your marriage, but it does not end financial claims.
That means:
Your ex-partner could make a claim years later
Future assets (like inheritance or business growth) could be considered
There is no clean financial break unless it is formally recorded
If matters escalate, one person may apply to court using a form A to begin financial proceedings.
This is where costs increase and communication breaks down even further.
How a Financial Consent Order Would Have Helped Us
If we had taken the time to formalise our agreement, we would have had:
Clear expectations from the start
Legal protection against future claims
Less stress and fewer arguments
A defined point where finances were “finished”
Instead, we spent months revisiting the same conversations.
A financial consent order doesn’t just protect money. It protects peace of mind.
The Role of Family Mediation
One thing we wish we had done earlier was family mediation.
Mediation gives you space to:
Talk through finances calmly
Understand what is fair for both people
Work towards a written agreement
A mediator does not take sides. Their role is to help both people communicate and reach their own decisions.
For couples like us, who struggled to talk without conflict, this could have made a real difference.
What Is a Clean Break Consent Order?
In some cases, couples want no ongoing financial ties at all.
This is where a clean break consent order comes in.
A clean break means:
No future claims against each other
No ongoing financial responsibilities (except those agreed, like child-related costs)
A clear financial separation
For many people, this provides reassurance and a sense of closure.
What Happens If You Don’t Have One?
We learned this the hard way.
Without a financial consent order, you risk:
Future financial claims
Disagreements over what was “agreed”
Stress and ongoing contact
Potential court proceedings
Even if things feel amicable now, situations can change. New relationships, job changes, or financial pressure can all reopen old discussions.
Practical Tips If You’re Going Through Divorce
If you are currently separating, here are a few things that can help:
1. Don’t rely on verbal agreements
Write everything down clearly.
2. Consider mediation early
It can help avoid misunderstandings later.
3. Be open about finances
Full disclosure helps build fair agreements.
4. Think long-term
Consider pensions, future income, and housing needs.
5. Get your agreement legally approved
This is what turns your agreement into a financial consent order.
Where to Start
If you already have an agreement, the next step is making it legally binding.
You can explore options such as Mediate UK's fixed fee consent order service.
Taking this step early can prevent disputes later.
Final Thought
Divorce can feel like the end of a chapter. But without a clear financial agreement, it can leave loose ends behind.
A financial consent order is not just paperwork. It is a way to move forward with clarity and confidence.
If you are unsure where to begin, start by having the conversation. Even if communication feels difficult, there are structured ways to reach an agreement that works for both of you.
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